My dad, Roger James, born in Nov 1931 always said throughout his life, ‘I don’t want a funeral’. We talked openly about death, organ donation etc (I used to be a nurse so I welcomed these conversations with him) way before he was diagnosed July 2018 with terminal cancer. To the ‘I don’t want a funeral’ statement I would always respond, ‘well, I and likely others will!’ After being diagnosed he still said ‘I don’t want a funeral but I understand you and others will’. I asked him if he wanted burial or cremation – clearly burial and he knew and was ‘happy’ he’d be in an unmarked grave and part of a meadow. Anyhow, the main reason for the story is that when registering his death I realised ‘I don’t want funeral’ is because he assumed it would be a church service, how would he have thought it would/could be any different?
