We had a stillborn baby girl at full term. Our first child. No experience of being a family. No rest of family close by. No help with counselling – it was 1978. In isolation in the maternity hospital, a nurse said that they “would deal with it”. We had held her – just to see her face at the birth and then she was whisked away. We could not name her – just register the stillbirth but only at the Registry Office, not at the hospital. We therefore had no funeral. Was told to take Epsom Salts to stop the milk coming – and then we went home to grieve. 3 years later I found out that she had been buried. I visited the plot – under a beech tree where children are laid. She is still a black hole in our lives. We had 2 other children – happily.
